As hubby and I were headed home last night after an extremely long day, he suddenly said: do you know what I would like to do? I asked him what it was.. he said " I want to spank you right into the New Year!" What a difference a year makes.
My thought was how appropriate, after all there are unresolved issues from 2013 and might as well start covering bases for 2014 while we were there. We got home and got comfortable, had a little ice cream while waiting for the ball to drop signifying the start of a new year. T-minus 30 seconds and counting, he pulled the strap out and told me to turn around. No over the lap? What the heck? I thought this was going to be an easy spanking.. just saying.. we are just celebrating a new year right?
So at T-minus 20, he proceeded with smacking my backside, kindly providing a swat with each second until after the New Year had arrived and then added three more I presume for good measure. Let's just say.. I had a stinging backside to think about already in the New year.
So that's how I ended my year and started my New Year. Quite a change. It also gave me much to think about as we move ahead. I see there will be much work to be done by us both, but I suspect most of the changes that will occur will be from my side as I learn what his true expectations of me are and he holds me accountable to meeting those expectations.
I have already shared how stubborn I can be, extremely strong willed, which basically translates into having a very defiant spirit. Not a quality you want to have when learning submission. It will get in the way every time along with self pride. I think it is probably one of the hardest traits to handle.
I also suspect that in breaking this defiant spirit of mine, I am going to have a very sore bottom, as he teaches me the lessons I need to learn in order to open my heart and my mind and actually "hear" and "accept" what he has to say. While we have been together many years, I have wasted much time in not listening and doing what is expected. This will be the year that this changes.
I am certain there will be many up's and down's for us both, again more for me then for him, but I am committed to going through "the ring of fire" or over his lap as needed and experiencing the "fire and burn" of his hand on my bottom as he drives his points home.
Kind of sad that it takes this kind of discipline for me to get on the same page. However, I have come to the acceptance of this lifestyle in order to reap the benefits of a closer, and more intimate relationship with my forever love.
There really are no words to express how wonderful my husband is. Let's just say that he deserves nothing but my best. I need to "get over" whatever issues I have, adjust my attitude, and give him my submission plain and simple.
I will be looking to him for his guidance and direction in getting me to the place that I need to be. It will require consistancy and communication on his part, it will require me to keep my mind and heart open, it will require me to listen and to follow through regardless of whether I agree. It will require me to submit to his leadership and desires. It will require my undivided acceptance of what will be required of me. It will require my all.
I suspect my true journey is about to begin.