Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Lesson Learned

Oh my. What a trying time this has been for me. And you know, this could have all been avoided if I had sat down and talked with hubby about this before proceeding. I would have known his concerns and whether I agreed or not, I could have stated my reasons and we could have come to an understanding without ever having to go through this process. But we went through it, and there was a lesson to be learned.

There can only be one captain of the ship, one chief for a tribe, and one leader for a home. While respectfully, the leader needs to consider all information placed before them to make an informed decision, they are ultimately charged with the responsibilty for those that they lead and care for. When one stops to reflect upon this, you begin to have a fine appreciation of that responsibilty. They have to keep the entire picture in front of them, and often undo mistakes made on behalf of those they are responsible for in order to protect them from harm, seen or unforseen. It takes a strong leader to shoulder this responsibility.

I have been with my man for 40 years now. I shudder to think about the many times I have not followed his lead and the results of having that stubborn pride that caused hardships for me and for us. If I had been following his lead all along, I am certain many situations we have experienced on life's journey would have been avoided.

There is something to be said for immediate and timely obedience whether you agree in the moment or not. It can save heartache, misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and wrong perceptions which can lead both of us to a very hard place. This was such a time. While on the surface the issue seemed innocent enough, the stakes were high and there was plenty of room for serious consequences to have occured.

While this incident could have and should have resulted in a painful punishment spanking for me, for disrespect, and dangerous behavior, it did not. Hubby has a way with words that cuts through the matter at hand and he nails the issue everytime. That's not to say that I always agree, understand or even want to do as I am asked, the issue is this... he is the leader in our home, he is owed my respect, prompt obedience and my gratitude for making the hard decisions in life that affect us both. I am thankful for this man of mine. The further I move along on this journey, the more I realize what a wonderful plan God had, when he paired us together for life.


  1. Annabelle,
    Well stated and I can hear your love and submission

  2. Yes Meredith, as my love has grown more intense over the past several months, it is getting easier to find my soft spot in my heart and therefore submission from my heart which is all that has been asked of me.

  3. "There is something to be said for immediate and timely obedience whether you agree in the moment or not." You know I think about that very thing a lot. Submitting no matter what. Submitting whether you want to or not is probably the key to true submission as well as it being from the heart. My husband has said that it isn't submission if he has to spank it out of me, he will do it, but he prefers submission from my desire to please him. I am sure most HoH's do prefer that. It's difficult to give sometimes though because unfortunately we don't always feel submissive. <3 Great post Annabelle :)


  4. Sara.. I will feel so much better when I can master immediate obedience and submission from my heart as automatic responses. I know I feel better in those moments. Whether I like it or not in te moment, I am glad in the end when hubby places things into clear perspective and I can let go and just do.

    1. I feel that way too. Although when I am being naughty it feels really fun, I usually regret it later. When I submit I never regret that. :)