Saturday, February 4, 2017

Sir's thoughts on marriage

So yesterday, I am busily working away on my computer taking care of work things, and Sir is sitting behind me reading the newspaper. Suddenly he shared with me a thought he had after reviewing how many marriage licenses had been issued and how many marriage dissolutions had been awarded. Humm he says.. very sad. Only 1 marriage license issued but 43 couples are now divorced. That is so sad and there is a way that in most instances would resolve most marriages from failing. My ears went up. I was in "listening mode"
Sir went on.. I think all couples should be required to attend a class where the men are taught what it is to lead in  their homes and ladies are taught how to be submissive to their husbands. All it takes is one simple ruler. I would have the men write their name at the bottom of the ruler in permanent marker. They would then pass the ruler to their partner and the ladies would be told to write their name on the ruler at the opposite end and return the ruler to their men.
He goes on to say as the instructor he would then tell the ladies in the class to stand up, face the table, pull down their panties and bend over the table.
While he is certain they would protest and ask many questions, they would be reminded to do as they are told and they would soon learn the reason why. Next, men would be told to stand up & pick up their ruler and place their hand on the end where they had signed their name. They would then be told to take 3 steps back and firmly swing smacking the bare bottom of their lady with the end that they had signed making sure to leave a lasting impression on their bottoms and leaving no question in the ladies minds as to who would be in charge of their home moving ahead.
Wow!  I just started giggling... well pretty much out right laughing. I looked at Sir and while he chuckled along with my laughter, suddenly he grew silent and said he really wasn't kidding. I stopped laughing and continued to listen. He said if more couples started their relationships out in this manner there would definitely be less turmoil and much more happiness in their homes after all it has worked for us hasn't it? Well.. yes I quietly said. "I can't hear you he said." I looked him in the eyes and said "yes sir, it has." Good he says, that's what I thought. See it is very simple really. Men lead, ladies are to follow. It's not that hard. If ladies make it hard, well that's their choice. Men have the means and capability to take matters into their own hands and resolve those issues. With that he got up to take care of some work in another room leaving me to think over this conversation.
I felt as though I had just experienced a revelation into what Sir really does think about TTWD all without me having to hold an "official conversation" It is perfectly clear to me that what we have been doing for all of these many years has been intentional at least on his part even though neither one of us knew there was an "official term" for TTWD. Sir is a "natural" born HOH. How lucky am I really? The rest of our day went well until we were leaving for the night. It had snowed all day, and as we were clearing the truck for our departure, I thought I had done what was needed so I hopped inside to get warm. Sir gets inside and says, "get back out and check that windshield wiper and be sure it is not stuck to the window." Well my halo fell off as I snapped back, "it's not stuck to the window, I just brushed away some of the fluffiest snow ever. We are good." Silence. I looked over at Sir and he had leaned over real close to me. He said.. "what was that?" I repeated myself quite huffily. He then said very quietly... I don't think that was the right response. I wasn't asking you your opinion, I was telling you to check the windshield wiper so we are good to go. Am I not making myself clear?  I stopped suddenly. Yes, he was now perfectly clear now that he had my attention. I got back out and did as he asked and while the wiper was not stuck, I had checked it as asked and we were ready to head home. Lesson learned.

On to this morning. I awoke early on purpose to take care of some things before the next storm hits us today as we would not be getting home until late. In the process, I locked myself out of the house while Sir was in the shower. I was in my bathrobe and slippers and it was quite cold outside. I found the spare keys in the garage and was able to let myself back in. By then though I was rattled, frustrated and getting rather sassy. Sir asked me what I had been doing. Well... the flood gates opened.
Never a good thing when this happens as not only will I relay my current displeasure but always manage to add a thing or to that really has no relevance to the current situation. Sir listened as he continued to get ready for the day. Occasionally adding a comment or two and laughing a bit. He asked if I had learned something here. Yes I said all not to nicely. "Be very sure you have a spare key. "
He says.. "try again" looking at me quite intently. Suddenly I became quiet. Ummm, perhaps not going outside of the house in my bathrobe and slippers in the snow and cold? Yes he said. No apologies or anything like he was sorry that had happened to me or anything. I turned and walked into the bedroom and proceeded to get ready. Already undressed, I heard Sir enter the room and turned to look at him.
There he stood with his HOH stick. I now hate this arts and crafts project he had me make last year.
Quietly he said.. put your hands in front of you and bend over the bed now. I looked at him and said "I don't think that's necessary. I haven't done anything wrong really, in fact I am the one that is having a hard morning." Uh-huh he says, and that is exactly why you are finding yourself in this situation. Now do as I say right now. Over the bed I went and he definitely put some swing behind that stick. After he had done what was needed he stopped. I thought I was ok, but when I came up I just couldn't stop myself from flailing my hands. Back over he orders me. Apparently you didn't receive or accept my actions. Your being very defiant right now. Oh goodness. Nothing I said was changing his mind. So back over I went and he started over again. When he was done, he asked if I was ready to start the day over again with a fresh attitude. "Yes sir" I simply said. I finished getting ready but noted in the bathroom mirror that my bottom had many bright red marks across it. I came into the bedroom and told Sir what I had noted. All Sir said was good. My message I expect has been received. Yes Sir it has. And so... what a week I have had. Working on listening and learning what TTWD looks like for us. As we drove into work, I reflected upon the several things I had learned over the past two days. I was feeling appreciative for Sir's guidance. I turned to him and thanked him for his insight and help over the past two days. He said.. you are very welcome Whatever it takes to help you.
I truly love my Sir.


  1. Annabelle,
    It sounds as though Sir is going more talking literally and figuratively. Ouch! Those talks that end in a discussion of that sort always seems to help though. It becomes clear and painfully sore what is expected. Glad things are back to "normal".

  2. Hi Annabelle, this is what we could all see before you! He definitely knows what he is doing and has been doing for over forty years. I know it doesn't feel like it after this morning's start but you are very lucky. Hope you have a good week.
    love Jan, xx

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  4. I understand what Sunny is saying above, but have been slowly learning that although some directions from Sam may sound silly or pointless to me, they are practice for my submission. Just like doing scales on the piano, not questioning his leadership brings me closer to my goal.

    Loved this post, Annabelle!

  5. He's sharing that he's always been there for you. I'm glad you both are good!

  6. Glad your Sir helped you to understand and things are now good Annabelle.
    Hugs Lindy