Friday, November 18, 2016

Thankfulness & Gratitude and I am on a mission.....


 
 So before too much more time gets away and we are all caught up with our family and friends for the Thanksgiving holidays, I would like to take this time to say a very special thank you to each one of you here in blog land for the kindness and support you have shown me this past year despite the many up's and downs. Know that I wish all of you safe travels and time spent with your family and friends that will bring you joy, laughter and fun. Thanksgiving often turns our hearts towards a spirit of gratitude.
I do find that when I spend more time reflecting on the things I am truly grateful for in my life, my attitude definitely changes and I have a softer approach and outlook in my life. That should include Sir as well. So this Thanksgiving, I am going to set aside some time to write down all the many things I am thankful for and grateful for in having Sir as my husband for 40 years. I am hopeful in doing so it will soften my heart, quite my mind down and help me to prepare myself for active communication that I am hopeful will occur and I can do so with active listening skills.


Are you listening to me? Do you hear what I am saying?



So I saw this quote and it hit home with me. How often has Sir said to me that he does not like or
appreciate my "tone?" Well now that I think about it, he says this nearly every conversation. I think in my haste to be heard I just talk right over him which must have to sound disrespectful and most likely he in fact tunes me out which is why I never feel heard. So.. in order to begin to see change it is I that needs to initiate the change beginning with my approach. Here is where I sure could use some feedback from any of you that find yourselves in a similar situation. How do you approach your partner when you have something of significance on your mind so that they are willing to take the time to sit down and hear you out? How do you keep things from spiraling out of control?

So for the most part, I feel my husband is a good leader, sometimes I don't see it until way after the fact, but more often than not he is right in his decisions. I saw this quote and I really want to reflect on this a bit longer. "The part about even if he is not leading the way I want him to".... Guilty as charged here ladies. I think I don't often give him enough credit for just being him, whether or not I am in agreement. That can't be good for his morale. I need to spend more time building him up than trying to get my own way. That will take time to practice and execute for sure.

So this Thanksgiving, I want to focus on all the things I am truly grateful for with Sir. The things he does are truly amazing to me, and they do make my heart happy and full. I want to learn to be appreciative where we are in the moment. But.. I do want him to hear how much better I think things can be for us both if we are truly following a TTWD lifestyle. Perhaps, I will just simply ask him what he thinks TTWD looks like to him, put duct tape across my mouth if I have to in order to let him say what he needs to say and I need to fully listen. Perhaps in doing so I will actually gain some insight as to where we are and where we might be heading.


I am hopeful in the end, we will look more like this, closer together with a much clearer understanding of where we are and where we are headed. Stay tuned.. I will fill you in on how this goes after Thanksgiving.











7 comments:

  1. Wishing you a wonderful Thanksgiving and a helpful chat! We do lots of chatting and we attempt TTWD but we are incredibly inconsistent. We talk about it though, so I have hope. Thank you so much for your blog.

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  2. What a wonderful idea...reminding you why the two of you fell in love to start with, and all the good things about hubby. TTWD is not a recipe thing, it looks and is different for everyone. One of the things I sometimes have to remind myself is that communication is a two way street, I need and should share my thoughts, but I also need to spend half the time..at least...listening...sounds easier than it actually is...takes practice. hugs abby

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  3. Annabelle,
    I commented yesterday on your LOL post. Thank you for giving me your email address I will write to you very soon, but first I am going to go back to the beginning of your blog. I have already started, and your very first post is so beautiful. Perhaps rereading that post might help you with your journey towards a spirit of gratitude for your Sir this Thanksgiving. You are an eloquent writer so I am wondering if that may be a place to start with your communication question.
    I am usually a quick reader so I hope to be in touch by email very soon (although the Thanksgiving holidays may slow me down a bit.). Sorry I feel this is a quick jumbled post, but I am eager to get back to reading your blog as I am already drawn into your story.

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  4. A wonderful thoughtful post. May you have a wonderful Thanksgiving. I hope the little expressions of gratitude to one another bring you closer together... Hugs

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  5. Hi Annabelle, it seems that you know just what to do to get things just where you want to be. Hope you can have that talk and listen session.
    love Jan, xx

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  6. Hey Annabelle...Wishing you a wonderful Thanksgiving and a lovely, loving and positive discussion. Active listening is awkward at first but well worth it.

    Hugs and blessings...Cat

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  7. Annabelle, I hope Thanksgiving gives you the springboard you need for meaningful discussion. Communication is the key, hard though it can be.
    Rosie xx

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