Update... 2 steps forward and 10 steps backward

 So... February has been a time in our house to work on listening and doing what has been asked with an improved attitude. What has really happened? Sad to say... I have been soundly spanked at least daily and on occasion more than once in the same day.

Yep, this is me. (wished I looked this good) either found myself over Sir's lap, bent over the bed, bent over the table, bent over the chair, bent over the kitchen sink and yes.. bent over my car. What is so unusual about this? Sir has suddenly taken off and is acting quickly and decisively with any behavior that is not to his liking. One minute things seem to be just fine, the next, I will see "the look" followed by a quick order to bring him an implement and bend over.

So I have faced the penalty for ongoing failure to comply with Sir's expectations even if I didn't necessarily realize what I was doing. Well ok.. in hindsight relooking at most situations after the fact I could see where I went wrong.

Once again, sassiness, raised voice, no response at all to Sir and his questions, oops.. ( shhhh name calling on one occasion) not being thoughtful or responsive to his requests, argumentative and just plain being stubborn and hot tempered has landed me in these situations and justifiably so.

The above Items I have been on the receiving end way too many times this month. Sir now has me get him the implement that he will use and bring it to him. I used to think that was odd when I read about that in books, not so much so now. There is a humbling and reflective attitude that comes in doing so that speaks volumes to me. One such incident I asked Sir to explain "why" he was spanking.
His answer.. " Because it is in your best interest and I will let the spanking speak for itself. When I am done I am quite certain there will be no question left in your mind what the issue was and what will be expected of you moving forward" Are we both clear on this? Well what does one say to that exactly?

So while I am certain I have many things to continue working on... it is my mouth that gets me in trouble every single time. I don't know yet when to stop speaking, stop arguing and simply do as I am told. I do find when I purposefully practice simply saying "yes sir" things go oh so much better, but I really have to work very hard at this. So rather than grasp at all the many things I am sure I need to work on.. the first is to control my responses and my conversations. Yes...this involves listening to Sir and accepting his leadership without feeling I have to add my 2 cents into every conversation.

So, I continue to struggle with watching "my tone" If any of you other ladies struggle with this same issue, I would welcome your feedback as to the things you do to stay in check and out of hot water.

As for right now, there are only two ways in our house that work. The right way which pleases Sir, and the wrong way which I tend to do most days even though I am working hard to improve here.

Despite some very heated discussions in our home this month and not to mention a very frequently heated and sore bottom, we are slowly finding our way here through TTWD. It's hard I won't lie.
Relinquishing control is very hard when you are a strong willed person like myself. I will keep trying, & I will persevere because I do want Sir to be happy and I want us to  succeed with TTWD.
And so.... Listening, communicating and accepting consequences are where we are at this time.
And on a brighter note....

 Spring is officially 4 weeks ahead. Something to look forward to after this bitterly cold and snowy winter. I don't know about you, but I, for one, am looking forward to a change in the season.

In the meantime, I will try very hard to behave and stay out of trouble. Wish me luck on that one!!