So it is suppose to be natural for us to obey our husbands. But is it really?
Sure when we are in agreement and everything is going our way, no problems. Everything works out well for all. But what happens when we do not agree with what is being asked, or we are having a bad day, or we just plain don't feel like it?
And so.... because I have "attitude," I am most certain this is what would happen next. I showed hubby this picture of the little girl.. and with a twinkle in his eye, he just laughed, and said this was so me, and yep.... he would be done talking and moving on to making his point.
Hope everyone is having a great 4th of July weekend with family and friends.
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ReplyDeleteAnnabelle,
ReplyDeleteI needed to rewrite my comment. It sounds like things are brewing at your house just like at mine. Hang in there!
Meredith
"So it is suppose to be natural for us to obey our husbands"
ReplyDeleteWait ? WHAT? Did I miss something?
Seriously Annabelle, there is not a woman I know in this type of relationship that it is NATURAL for. I suppose there are women out there,(none I know personally) If it were easy/natural there wouldn't be a need for Dd. There would be a lot more of 'slap and tickle' relationships- which is fine too.
More recently I have met people in a forum, an HoH specifically who was kind enough to explain to me that the struggle he sees from his wife, and once she submits is what he loves about her. He doesn't want someone who would just blindly follow. NOW he is the one who brought it to their relationship, so I asked Barney which type of submission he preferred, the automatic, anticipate what he needs kind, or the one where I need to dig deep ( and yes often fail). He chose the latter right away, without thought.
I also had the conversation about being a burden. Both men said, to stop thinking like that. Our husbands love us and the ultimate goal is peace, harmony, CONNECTION...and communication. So you had a bad day/ week/ month. It happens...OH LORD does it happen, but even by showing your husband the little girl in the corner, you were reaching out to him. You were showing him that you recognized how you are- even if it was in a humourous way. That is still a great sign.
I know times are difficult with the situation you find yourself in, but be kind to yourself. Be patient with yourself. I have to admit, I don't know with all those external pressures how quickly Barney would be willing to step up like your husband did. That is a (painful) but good sign Annabelle. He recognizes the need for both of you.
Love willie
I love the pictures, woudn't it be nice if it did come naturally this obedience lark. I hope you and hubby are okay with everything now
ReplyDeletelove Jan.xx
There is nothing natural in submitting but the peace and pleasure are reward enough usually. Yesterday after 13 hrs together most of which was in the car, and after Don accidentally smashed into the door of a friends car, things were ohhhh a mite tense ( Jackie given to under statements today). I made a teeny weeny comment about Dons speed. Oyyyy. Don started yelling and there's me being all stupid. Justifying myself. He finally said shut up. I hate that. So now I'm on my high horse about respect and not speaking to me that way. And I heard shut up again. But my mouth kicks in before my brain engages and there goes my mouth again. He starts pulling off the side of the interstate and then I shut up. He sat a moment and started driving again. I thought for sure I'd hear a "get your ass into the bedroom" but fortunately he was tired and angry and I quietly went into the house and crawled into bed. Woke up this morning with a belt next to me and was told to bond with the belt. Fell back to sleep clutching it but it 3pm and still sitting. Don is tired thank goodness. Maybe I will get away with my not so natural submission last night but the day isn't over.
ReplyDeleteNatural. Pshawwww
Natural, lol, I must have missed that part. I have done corner time. I find it harder than the spanking. To stand there and be still and think is quite a test of submission. If someone said I would actually stand in a corner because Luke thought I needed to do it I would have thought they were crazy. Now that he's used it a few times I have to say it's one of the things that really helps me get my head wrapped around the idea of obeying my husband. Crazy but it really works!
ReplyDeleteStubborn and prideful is a good description of me too! We do corner time, and honestly, I'm frequently there, not as a punishment but as a way to calm my tone or the situation down. Everything in this lifestyle takes time to develop, it requires sooo much communication and trial and error. Corner time used to infuriate me, because he would lecture me there, and I couldn't say anything back. It caused so much more anger, we had to talk and revamp it. He does it now to cool the situation down, to prevent it from escalating to a spanking, and to help with my mindset. It works, but it took us a long time to even figure out the corner time formula, talk to him and tell him how you think it might help you :)
ReplyDeleteand LOL and the natural submission, in good times it might seem easier. I want my husband to be happy, but submitting..not so easy! ;)
Haha, obeying definitely does NOT come naturally--it is a learned habit that takes lots of effort and practice (and mistakes).
ReplyDeleteI've had corner time, and, of course, my mind wanders to everything except for what I should be thinking about ;)
I firmly believe every act of submission is a choice I have to make. Definitly not natural. It is actually one of the big issues Jordan and I have had with Dd. We are on a Christian basis and believe wives should submit to their husbands to be a " Godly" wife. At first Jordan thought I shoulnt need punishments. It just didn't work.
ReplyDelete